Many years ago, as I stood in front of the audience hearing my voice quiver, feeling my hands shake, and thinking at any moment my mind would go blank, I fully understood why fear of public speaking is often ranked as people's #1 fear. It was impossible for me to tap into my true power as a speaker, when I had to internally contend with a body that was in terror.

I tried lots of things. Practice and preparation smoothed things over slightly. Toastmasters helped sort of. But the main thing that helped me overcome my fears are some key concepts from Neuro-Linguistic Programming:

Become Friends With The Part Of You That Is Scared

If you are teaching something to someone, you will be much more successful if they feel like you respect them. When they feel safe with you, they will lower their guard in order to learn from you. The same need for respect is true when you are wanting to teach yourself a new pattern. Rather than hating the part of yourself that you wish to change, accept and recognize what it gives you in a positive way.

Often times the scared part of ourselves is diligent; it really wants to do a good job. It has a lot of energy; and it can also be vulnerable. Diligence, energy, and vulnerability can be valuable assets to a presenter. If we direct this energy properly, it will give our presentations more impact. When your scared part begins to realize it's value, it can begin to relax and mature.

Focus On What You Want

There is a tremendous power of the unconscious mind that can be utilized to transform feelings of fear. Your unconscious mind believes what is repeated the most often. Repeat what you would like to achieve, and eventually your unconscious mind will believe that.

When the natural feelings of fear arise, imagine what it is that you want to feel. Imagine your body feeling relaxed and grounded, your voice sounding strong and resonant, and see yourself looking directly into the eyes of the audience. It is important to know specifically what you will see, hear and feel. It will make the whole experience more vivid.

There is a part of the brain that can not tell the difference between a real event and an imagined event. When you imagine yourself feeling, sounding, and looking as you would like while giving a dynamite presentation, you are rehearsing that and creating the neural pathways to allow it to happen.

Awareness Of Your Mission As A Speaker

When we become aware of our mission and become immersed in our message, fear no longer has a hold on us. The life of our message becomes more important than how we think the audience is judging us. The paradox is, the less we focus on the audience's judgements, the more favorable their opinions.

It is vitally important when we speak before a group that we are interested and invested in the material. If you aren't interested, believe me your audience won't be. There are far too many boring, lifeless speeches out there. Don't add to the pack. Believe in your mission as a communicator of your message, and your fear will take a back seat.

The Audience Wants You To Succeed

Not for your sake, but for their own sake. They would much rather have an enjoyable interesting experience with you than a dull one. Remember, they are on your side. Speech coach Lee Glickstein says, "When you see the beauty in the audience's eyes, there is no room for fear." Look in their eyes, see their humanness, see their vulnerability, see them.

When we are able to let go of the fear, we can enter into a new relationship with ourselves and with our audience. We are able to express ourselves from a place of strength and truth. Public speaking can transform into an event that is exhilarating, empowering, and believe it or not fun!